Tummy kissing

This morning, from the window of my bus, I saw a strange and wonderful thing. A man and a woman, both rather - how shall I put it? – rotund, stood side by side on the pavement. At first glance they were unconnected. Their arms hung loose and lifeless at their sides. Their faces didn’t even point towards each other.

Then I looked again. Those big, round tummies swelled outwards and…just…touched. These two, apparently disinterested people were connected by a tummy kiss.

*****

I don’t want to dwell on this game but… I was playing ‘Six Degrees’ on the bus the other day and realised a wonderful thing. My previously stated best connection from me to the lovely Hugh Jackman was 5. I was sorely and, indeed, piteously mistaken. I am, in fact, connected to the lovely Hugh Jackman by a paltry TWO DEGREES! Shall I tell you how?

Many years ago I met international stage and cinema star Alan Cumming in a pub in Broughton Street, Edinburgh. At this time, of course, he was not internationally famous. He was just quite well known in the locality as half of the scintillating comedy double act ‘Victor & Barry’. I forget which one he played but they were very, very funny. Anyhoo, there he was one afternoon, hanging out in a Broughton Street pub. I approached him, no doubt blathered some embarrassing nonsense at him and got his autograph.

And so, gentle reader, from this inauspicious meeting flowered the glorious fact of my being only TWO DEGREES away from the lovely Hugh Jackman (they were in the movie X-Men 2 together – in case you live under a rock).

*****

The St Magnus festival begins today in Orkney. With my usual, uncanny timing, I shall arrive on the island in time for the very end of the proceedings. Typical. I’m not too fussed, really. I don’t enjoy crowds so am hopeful most visitors will depart when the festival ends. I may get there in time to hear a fiddle concert, though. Fingers crossed.